The Relational Male

 Normative male alexithymia.  Okay, it's a psycholigal term meaning men without emotions.  It seems to be the reason why relationships don't last and why long-term relationships seem to be out of fashion these days.  Psychologists blame men who display one emotion and that is anger.  It's the only emotion many women see in men.  But is this why relationships don't last?  According to psychologist, sociologists, and medical professionals, the lack of emotions lowers testosterone levels and hence the "angry male syndrome."

Okay, I can't deal with it here in a few paragraphs, but I read a news article about this and decided to Google it and found many articles devoted to it.  So, I thought I'd throw in my two cents here and say that today's man is somehow learning that it's not masculine to demonstrate emotions other than anger.  But why?  Girls and boys have the same display of emotions, but as they get older men are seemingly taught to keep their emotions to themselves, hence the male depression syndrome.  

I almost hesitated to write about this, because I am told anger seems to be one emotion I don't display.  But I know what anger does.  I choose simply not to go there.  I can become irritated, but not enough to be angry.  But it seems anger is one emotion that seems okay for men to have.  Where does it come from?  Is it taught that it is okay to demonstrate anger and no other emotions?

I'm an old codger who's been married fifty years to the same woman.  And maybe I know a thing or two about women and it seems I'm still learning from what I've read.  I can blame the Internet, violent movies, and video games and maybe they all play a role.  But it seems women aren't willing to put up with a one-dimensional male.  Maybe back in the day men were always kind of one-dimensional and women just put up with them, but is this a new battle of the sexes?

I won't venture into the subject much further, but long-lasting relationships seem to be an exception and not the rule.  But it seems to me that if men want long-term relationships they have a lot of work ahead of them.  I could talk about the angry white male, but it seems that's not a myth and affects not just white men.  Some venture to guess this is why there are too many Karen's in this world, but that is another topic for another time.  

I almost deleted this post this morning and not have anything at all, but I came across this as a news item yesterday and decided to delve into it.  If a man wants to keep a woman, he needs laughter and maybe once in a while a tear or two and not when he's lost a video game he's spent a week playing.  Life is full of emotions.  And this is one thing I've learned.  It takes a real man to experience them.  I don't have too many emotions when I'm smoking pipes, but I can have thoughts that run the gamut of emotions.  I never know what I'll think of next--like this post.  Thank you for your time and Peace to each one of you.

Dave