No Longer

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 I quit worrying about my Angels years ago.  I was told they were a psychosis and I hallucinated them; that they were demons; and that I lied and just made them up.  If any of these things were true, very simply put, I wouldn’t be here.  It took two near death experiences to convince my wife.  It took some nearly twenty years to convince a social worker.  And it took 25 years for me to find community.

But through it all I prevailed.  I wasn’t about to give up.  And I never have in 31 years.  Very simply put, if any of these things were true, one thing is evident:  I very simply wouldn’t be here.  I am the ONLY proof I have.  I wasn’t going to talk about them until my family believed me.  I learned one thing from all this:  God does the convincing; not me.  All I have to do is live and God doesn’t care how, but just that I live.

I no longer worry about convincing anyone.  It’s not up to me.  I am just a vessel and it’s all I can be.  What they told me in its entirety might not be believed by many.  Most anyone would think I’m just psychotic.  But if that were the case, I very simply wouldn’t exist.  

I am the ONLY proof.  There were no witnesses.  I could have made it all up or they were a figment of my imagination.  But again, I AM THE proof.  That is as simple as I can make it.  I told my wife if I die before the Messiah comes she can put on my gravestone that I died because I lied.  As long as I am alive the only proof I have is myself.

Now do I sometimes wish God would in some way tell others?  My thinking is that in some way He will.  Some doubts still linger, but while at one time I worried about those doubts of others I quit worrying after the vids were released.  I quit worrying about what others thought.  One, I’m too old to worry about what others think, but more importantly, I quit caring.  In short time all will be known.  And most importantly, I know the truth and only I know what I know.  I put confidence in myself, but most importantly, I have confidence in God.

I relax while I smoke my pipe and let God worry.  I decided this long ago.  After I did my vids I was different.  I had confidence in my Angels and still do.  If I didn’t, I simply wouldn’t be here.  It’s this confidence that keeps me relaxed.  So, I smoke my Spiritual pipe and relax in confidence.  Today it is my Dunhill pipe and my tobacco is Smooth English.  My coffee this morning is Stumptown Homestead coffee.  Thank you for your time and Peace to each one of you.

Dave

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